Diana or Myra?

Today is the tenth anniversary of the death of Diana, Princess of Wales. A commemorative service took place earlier today in Guards Chapel not very far from here. I am reminded that just over ten years ago (when the nation was engulfed by hysteria over the death of Princess Diana) there was an exhibition at the Royal Academy of portraits of famous and infamous personalities of the 20th century. One of the people to be featured was Myra Hindley. Somebody threw a bucket of red paint over her portrait in disgust and that reignited the whole Myra story in the media. My old friend, Frank Longford (1905-2001) and I had been dislodged from our offices to facilitate refurbishment work during the parliamentary recess and had to share a committee room in the House of Lords. To overhear Frank's telephone calls was of enormous entertainment value! Anyway, he had been invited on to a tv programme (London Tonight) to discuss the latest Myra episode. We had lunch in the Strangers Cafeteria and Frank asked me how old I was. Almost thirty, I admitted. Frank said "Well I've been supporting Myra's case for almost as long as you've been around, and you know, it's difficult to think of something original to say. Therefore, I plan to ask the studio audience a rhetorical question tonight, namely who do they think presented the more inspiring role model to society; Diana or Myra?" I said "for fuck's sake Frank - you will get lynched tonight!". However, the Southall rail crash took place later that day and Carlton Television rang up to say that Lord Longford's appearance was no longer necessary as the news priority had changed. Lucky escape?

The Times

I have had a letter published in The Times today. It concerns the funeral of John Biffen (see earlier post). I provide a link in case you would like to read it : www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/debate/letters/article2357765.ece

This is the second time I have ever had a letter published in The Times. Much more than a decade ago I had a rather pompous letter in The Times concerning modern manners and courtesy (as you might expect). I am a Times devotee. When I was at school in Perthshire we had three papers to choose from: The Scotsman, The Guardian and The Daily Telegraph so naturally I only read the DT. When I moved to London precisely twenty years ago they said in my W1 flatshare "we take The Times darling" and so The Times it has been ever since. Most of my friends take the DT and the Times in extremis. I am the other way round. Needless to say I wouldn't bother my arse with the others.

Lord Gerry Fitt 1926 - 2005

Tomorrow (Sunday) marks the second anniversary of the death of my old friend, Gerry Fitt. Gerry called me to the Bar! As his principal legal adviser I can tell you that the court rarely met in private. Our chambers were convened in public hostelries and family size gin & tonics, no ice, no lemon (ice is very noisy when you have a hangover) were our stock in trade. My friendship with Gerry has provided me with a great fund of stories, most of which should not be told in polite company. The word f**k features quite a lot! There are two biographies in circulation at the moment. One is less worthy than the other. I could heartily recommend Fighting Fitt by Chris Ryder. One anecdote worth recording here is an encounter we had with the late Lord Merlyn-Rees in a corridor of the Lords a week before Recess. Gerry said to Merlyn "Ah hallo Merlyn. We're off next week so we are, so you'll be able to rest up and take life a wee bit easier [Merlyn was visibly in decline]. "Not likely Gerry; I'm off to Acapulco next week" he replied. Gerry's riposte was "Acapulco, Merlyn? Isn't that a wee bit ambitious? You look to me today as if you're not going to make it to the end of the fockin corridor"! I can't imagine what Gerry would make of Paisley the pussy-cat and Mr Nice Guy Martin McGuiness poncing about the Province. What I do know is that there are very many people on both sides of the Irish Sea who greatly admired Gerry and are the better for having known him. I will remember him at Mass (he was a good Catholic if not a fanatic) and raise a tumbler of gin to him. I might even ring Frank Carson to get a Gerry Fitt yarn out of him - but that will probably push up the 'phone bill a bit - and I haven't worked out how to get on to TalkTalk yet but I think Frank could give me the details!

The Rt Hon Lord Biffen, DL 1930 - 2007

No man is a hero to his valet. I had the dubious privilege of serving as John Biffen's last private secretary in the House of Commons from 1992 to 1997. He may well have been brilliant but fun he was not. I have heard and read a lot of piss and wind in recent days about the great man. Very little of it reminds me of the person I knew so well. There was a reasonable turnout at his funeral in Llanyblodwel, Shropshire, on Tuesday. Five years of faithful service led me to nowhere in particular! John didn't keep in touch after '97 and rarely had a greeting for me when occasionally we bumped into one another in the Lords. The last time I met him was at Paul Getty's memorial service when he was looking almost as cheerful as the pic opposite. I knew the next occasion he would be no more. As the man at Shrewsbury crem pressed the button and fired John into the cosmos I raised a glass of champagne to the old bugger. I have signed copies of Inside The House of Commons and Inside Westminster that I could release for a fee - if anyone is keen?