Barly RIP 23 May 1993 - 15 November 2007

In the early hours of this morning my little companion of nearly fifteen years, Barly, went home to Heaven. His death was not unexpected but a tremendous relief that he went naturally and peacefully. We lived together in Pimlico, Barnet, Crystal Palace and Westminster. He will be laid to rest tomorrow in Hertfordshire.

Puppy love is an extraordinary thing and Barly gave me more than any other. Fifteen years is a long time and I shall have to take life one day at a time. In the meantime, I couldn't help thinking that a verse in this morning's Prayer of the Church (Thursday - Week IV) was very apt "We leave our fate with thee, and wait - Thy bidding when to go".

Barly will probably be the subject of other postings. He featured in the columns of the Evening Standard's Londoner's Diary a few times so his life was not without colour. May he rest in peace.

Diana or Myra?

Today is the tenth anniversary of the death of Diana, Princess of Wales. A commemorative service took place earlier today in Guards Chapel not very far from here. I am reminded that just over ten years ago (when the nation was engulfed by hysteria over the death of Princess Diana) there was an exhibition at the Royal Academy of portraits of famous and infamous personalities of the 20th century. One of the people to be featured was Myra Hindley. Somebody threw a bucket of red paint over her portrait in disgust and that reignited the whole Myra story in the media. My old friend, Frank Longford (1905-2001) and I had been dislodged from our offices to facilitate refurbishment work during the parliamentary recess and had to share a committee room in the House of Lords. To overhear Frank's telephone calls was of enormous entertainment value! Anyway, he had been invited on to a tv programme (London Tonight) to discuss the latest Myra episode. We had lunch in the Strangers Cafeteria and Frank asked me how old I was. Almost thirty, I admitted. Frank said "Well I've been supporting Myra's case for almost as long as you've been around, and you know, it's difficult to think of something original to say. Therefore, I plan to ask the studio audience a rhetorical question tonight, namely who do they think presented the more inspiring role model to society; Diana or Myra?" I said "for fuck's sake Frank - you will get lynched tonight!". However, the Southall rail crash took place later that day and Carlton Television rang up to say that Lord Longford's appearance was no longer necessary as the news priority had changed. Lucky escape?

The Times

I have had a letter published in The Times today. It concerns the funeral of John Biffen (see earlier post). I provide a link in case you would like to read it : www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/debate/letters/article2357765.ece

This is the second time I have ever had a letter published in The Times. Much more than a decade ago I had a rather pompous letter in The Times concerning modern manners and courtesy (as you might expect). I am a Times devotee. When I was at school in Perthshire we had three papers to choose from: The Scotsman, The Guardian and The Daily Telegraph so naturally I only read the DT. When I moved to London precisely twenty years ago they said in my W1 flatshare "we take The Times darling" and so The Times it has been ever since. Most of my friends take the DT and the Times in extremis. I am the other way round. Needless to say I wouldn't bother my arse with the others.

Lord Gerry Fitt 1926 - 2005

Tomorrow (Sunday) marks the second anniversary of the death of my old friend, Gerry Fitt. Gerry called me to the Bar! As his principal legal adviser I can tell you that the court rarely met in private. Our chambers were convened in public hostelries and family size gin & tonics, no ice, no lemon (ice is very noisy when you have a hangover) were our stock in trade. My friendship with Gerry has provided me with a great fund of stories, most of which should not be told in polite company. The word f**k features quite a lot! There are two biographies in circulation at the moment. One is less worthy than the other. I could heartily recommend Fighting Fitt by Chris Ryder. One anecdote worth recording here is an encounter we had with the late Lord Merlyn-Rees in a corridor of the Lords a week before Recess. Gerry said to Merlyn "Ah hallo Merlyn. We're off next week so we are, so you'll be able to rest up and take life a wee bit easier [Merlyn was visibly in decline]. "Not likely Gerry; I'm off to Acapulco next week" he replied. Gerry's riposte was "Acapulco, Merlyn? Isn't that a wee bit ambitious? You look to me today as if you're not going to make it to the end of the fockin corridor"! I can't imagine what Gerry would make of Paisley the pussy-cat and Mr Nice Guy Martin McGuiness poncing about the Province. What I do know is that there are very many people on both sides of the Irish Sea who greatly admired Gerry and are the better for having known him. I will remember him at Mass (he was a good Catholic if not a fanatic) and raise a tumbler of gin to him. I might even ring Frank Carson to get a Gerry Fitt yarn out of him - but that will probably push up the 'phone bill a bit - and I haven't worked out how to get on to TalkTalk yet but I think Frank could give me the details!

The Rt Hon Lord Biffen, DL 1930 - 2007

No man is a hero to his valet. I had the dubious privilege of serving as John Biffen's last private secretary in the House of Commons from 1992 to 1997. He may well have been brilliant but fun he was not. I have heard and read a lot of piss and wind in recent days about the great man. Very little of it reminds me of the person I knew so well. There was a reasonable turnout at his funeral in Llanyblodwel, Shropshire, on Tuesday. Five years of faithful service led me to nowhere in particular! John didn't keep in touch after '97 and rarely had a greeting for me when occasionally we bumped into one another in the Lords. The last time I met him was at Paul Getty's memorial service when he was looking almost as cheerful as the pic opposite. I knew the next occasion he would be no more. As the man at Shrewsbury crem pressed the button and fired John into the cosmos I raised a glass of champagne to the old bugger. I have signed copies of Inside The House of Commons and Inside Westminster that I could release for a fee - if anyone is keen?

The Last Confession

To the Theatre Royal on the Haymarket this evening for the opening night of The Last Confession starring David Suchet (pictured right). The title will immediately resonate with those of who us who profess to be Catholic. I remember being ousted from a confessional box in St Peter's in Rome once by an incandescent Maltese friar who told me I was putting a relationship with an other human being before my relationship with Jesus Christ. I was refused absolution on that occasion!

I wholeheartedly recommend this production. Dramatic thriller (kept me on the edge of the row all evening, handy for the champagne bar). The circumstances surrounding the death of the late Pope John Paul the First has provided no end of intrigue, story books etc. I suppose we will never know the actual truth of what happened. Next year marks the thirtieth anniversary of the event and many of the personalities who served at the Papal Court at the time are now rejoicing with the Lord (we hope). The Pope's former secretary, Monsignor John Magee, (pictured left) is still toiling in the vineyard of Cloyne at Cobh. If you have any questions about the facts of what happened on 28 September 1978, why don't you give Bishop Magee a call on +353 21 4811430. You may get voicemail!

The Last Confession explores the exercise and corruption of power, not only (seemingly) endemic in the Vatican in 1978, but in influential institutions everywhere, where the need to present a uniformed front is paramount. A must see, especially for Catholics, nominal or otherwise! ***** rating.

Happy Birthday, Your Majesty!

One of my neighbours [Her Majesty and I are merely separated by Buckingham Gate] celebrates her birthday in a very public way. During the week the usual channels supplied me with a ticket to enable my attendance at the spectacle on Horse Guards Parade this morning. As you know, I rather like uniforms! I imagine there were a few uncrowned queens present (not just spectators) and perhaps even a few divas on the parade ground? Well, I thought I had a fairly decent seat. I arrived punctually. There were four empty spaces adjacent to me (I was on the end of the front row in the block). I thought, what a waste. Maybe somebody slept in? A rather pompous looking fellow came along to do a "recce" and just before the ceremony began a couple of awkward looking chaps (wired up) came along and asked me to stand aside a second. I felt slightly miffed that I was going to be "squashed in" by these latecomers and bang goes my leg room! Then suddenly I spotted The Lady in-tow. I thought I recognised her. Ah yes, my old friend, Lady Thatcher. So there you are, Maggie sat next to me! Maggie, The Queen and Me. [For those of you who occasionally get a little confused, Maggie is the one on the right!]. The similar apparel* reminds one of the occasion when the Private Secretary at Number Ten telephoned the Private Secretary at BP to suggest that it might be a good idea to exchange notes about dress sense for certain public occasions to avoid a "clash" or the possibility of the two dames appearing at the same event similarly (not scantily - Heaven forbid!) clad. Her Majesty's "man" replied icily "Her Majesty never notices what other people are wearing". Quite so.

The perk to having a former Prime Minister seated next to you is that you become the second person to take leave of Horse Guards; with the military top brass, admirals, generals and the like, trailing behind. As I stepped into Whitehall behind Lady Thatcher, where the traffic had stopped to facilitate her, I heard someone mutter, with a hint of emotion; "She's still the real Prime Minister, you know". My sentiments exactly. Good old Maggie. [11 days to go, TB].

*I have a rather "exotic" hat that I contemplated wearing today. My father would have been furious and I resisted. The Hat will be the subject of a future posting!

Mr Louis Walsh

"F**k off. I don't know what you are doing sitting next to me anyway. I normally get a row to myself". My charming fellow passenger Louis Walsh on an Aer Lingus flight from Dublin a few weeks ago, just before he was axed from The X-Factor. [I have sensitive hearing and can't bear Ipods - a great curse - and I politely asked Louis to turn down his]. The Sunday People shared the story with a wider audience and Graham Norton asked Louis about his behaviour on his show. I asked the boy from Kiltimagh if he was auditioning to become the rudest man in Ireland!

Archbishop Dermot Clifford

"Martin Shaw is the greatest bore that ever walked, or at the very least, the greatest bore I ever met. Whenever I hear his name or see his face, I am reminded of a very long evening in Rome". +Dermot Clifford, Archbishop of Cashel & Emly

Dr Clifford is seen here in full flight - lecturing the Faithful - on what appears to be a very hot* day in Tipperary.

*Dr Clifford is probably working up a thirst. He is a successor of Archbishop Croke, the great temperance campaigner, you know!

Mark Field MP

When I began blogging, our wonderful local MP, Mark Field, had this to say; "I must confess I generally find blogs pretty self-indulgent but I was rather taken by your piece on the largely unrequited love in your life. Best wishes for a healthy, happier, love-filled thirty-ninth year!". Mark Field 17 July 2006

I have a huge amount of time for Mark. He is a very assiduous constituency MP. If ever the electors of the Cities of London and Westminster were daft enough to vote for someone else doubtless Mark could get a job modelling Lewin's shirts!

I am 39 on 30th July but the vacancy remains in the intimacy department ...!

Cardinal Thomas Winning 1925 - 2001

This Sunday also marks the sixth anniversary of the death of the late Cardinal Thomas Winning. I knew Tom Winning and last met him in Rome in February 2001 at the Consistory at which Desmond Connell of Dublin and Cormac Murphy-O'Connor were created members of the Sacred College of Cardinals. He was thoroughly good company despite displaying an antipathy to all things English, an unfortunate characteristic in my fellow Scots! I do regret his politics and some of his statements were a bit over-the-top. But there was no doubt where he stood - and you knew he was there. You might want to read Stephen McGinty's biography Turbulent Priest to get more of a flavour of the man and his story.

Cardinal Basil Hume OSB OM 1923 - 1999

This Sunday marks the eighth anniversary of the death of the late Cardinal Basil Hume. When I applied to the Diocese of Westminster in 1987 to be considered for training for the Priesthood, Cardinal Hume advised me to "go off and learn about the world you seem so anxious to preach to". He added "If you must come back; leave it for at least five years; no hurry!".

I considered Basil to be a saintly man and I observe the beginnings of a cult at his tomb in Westminster Cathedral - candles, flowers and petitions. Perhaps one day a future Archbishop of Westminster might be petitioned to initiate a Cause for sainthood?

"Always see the Gospel like a personal love letter from the Lord to yourself ". Cardinal Hume.